Sep 2, 2008

living in a tent

it's late and i'm the only one up on this farm we call home, the stars are above, a scurrying little animal is gnawing at the wall of the office i'm sitting near to get the wireless connection, crickets chirp, life is so peaceful and beautiful and clear and open and easy, unfolding just as it's meant to be, i'm letting go of my usual need to dictate the pace, direct the action, just letting it flow over and unfold as and when it should, trusting. over the past four days have met all the other parents in both boys' classes, a big gang of potential life-friends, and while of course my eyes were open to who might be a good match, i felt no rush, no need-based push to make it happen too soon. we'll have years together, don't need to find my best friend the first day, don't need to impose a quick first impression on anyone, just see what happens. not that we won't make dates, engage people, etc, but from such a position of strength and faith and trust, just being open to who is meant to be part of our lives in so many different ways. i'm even feeling the same about that for the boys, rather than desperately trying to help galen find that best friend, just help him engage with his peers and find his place. part of it is this place, this open community that continues to embrace and welcome and share, don't have to fight to get in, just breathe and be breathed in.

in case this is making no sense, we are living for 8 weeks at an ecovillage in Shawnigan Lake, living in our tent, sharing communal meals and chores, learning and helping build eco-friendly buildings, working in the organic garden and with the chickens/pigs/turkeys/ducks, pouring 2 scoops of sawdust on our poop in the composting toilet, hanging out with 20-somethings here for 3-6 month internships in the sustainable building school and other families interested in making this their life home when the 10 houses are built around the upper pond. While it admittedly is frustrating occasionally to have purchased our dream property but not be able to take possession until the end of September, this is an experience I wouldn't trade for anything, and the knowledge and insight and ideas and partnerships gained here will help us so much as we begin to create our own community on our land, in whatever form that ends up taking.

living in a tent is even more glorious than it may sound. it's big enough for two double blow-up mattresses, the kids sharing theirs right beside us (a good warm-up for the house, where we might end up sharing one family bedroom), one suitcase each for clothes, a single small shelf for some books and games. Warm, intimate, lets us fall asleep and awaken together and be part of each others rhythms. Small enough that we must and want to be outside or with the rest of the community for all waking hours, not craving nor slipping into escape, but fully engaged with the world. after dinner tonight we walked up to Vision hill and just at in the setting sun, looking over the farm and wetlands and mountains. Galen found a small altar and added a black feather in honour of his first day of school, then caught several types of bugs to look at then gently release. Zekiah just let me hold him, closing his eyes to drink in the warmth of the sun. There was no tv or computer or games shelf to distract us, just being a family together, and readying to sleep and dream and wake together.

speaking of which, they've all been asleep for 3 hours and i'm starting to shiver out here. gonna turn off this beast and walk back slowly under the stars (we don't have a working flashlight) to snuggle in with my beautifuls. May we all know and live such Peace

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